The Princess Puppy and the Pea

When we had Treat, she slept on the bed with us and that was okay, although a bit uncomfortable at times. We sort of made up our minds that after we lost her, we wouldn't have any more dogs sleeping on the bed. Our others didn't seem to have an interest in it. Once in a while Blueberry would get up there with us, but it was unusual for her to sleep all night there. So, we decided that it was alright if she got up there with us, but we weren't going to encourage her.

A month later, Bunny came to our house. She didn't get the memo about cute, adorable little puppies sleeping on the floor. Oh no! That very first night, she hopped right up on our bed and curled up right beside me. I was smitten. My husband was smitten. So, from the get go, the princess had her king-sized bed to sleep on. On occasion, she will sleep on a dog bed on the floor -- usually during the summer when it gets hot. Most of the time, however, she sleeps on the bed with us. Truth be told, if the door were open, she'd probably sleep in there all day, too.



Her habit of sleeping on the bed has instilled certain routines for us, however. A remarkable phenomenon happens when Bunny gets on to the bed. At the vet's office, the scale says she weighs 50.8 pounds, however, after she lays down on our bed, she suddenly weighs around five hundred pounds. Trying to move her over is an exercise in complete futility. So, generally, one of us goes to bed first, and gets comfortable, while piling a few pillows on the other side of the bed so the other person can have a space, while Bunny curls up in the center.

This sounds simple enough, I know. Yet somehow, when Bunny lays down, she always manages to be sideways, her little behind curled up in the middle of the space where your back should be. We're not talking about even a little sliver of space left over that you can cling to here, we're talking about just enough space so that Bunny's tail doesn't fall off the edge of the bed. On nights when I come to bed last, I walk in a few minutes after my husband and the hounds have turned in for the evening and generally find that my husband has misjudged how much space I actually require on my side of the bed, or that Bunny has rearranged the pillows in her favor. Amazingly enough, she manages to fall into a deep slumber in a matter of mere moments after curling up on the bed. This results in me arriving at the bed and the following conversation ensuing.

Me: Bunny, scoot over, I need to get into the bed!

Bunny: (ear twitches)

Me: I know you are not asleep yet!

Bunny : (burrows nose under husband's side of the blankets)

Me: Bunny! I'll still snuggle with you, but you have to let me get into the bed!

Bunny: (lays very still)

Husband: Bunny, I know you're not asleep! You were just pawing me to pet you! Now scoot over!

Bunny: (cracking open one golden eye) Sooooooo sleepy...

Me: You faker! Move over!

Husband: Bunny, move over and let her in the bed!

Bunny: (large yawn, followed by the nose burrowing even deeper into the blankets)

Husband: Alright Bunny! Look out!

At this point, my husband begins moving his hand under the covers, which always gets some kind of reaction from Bunny. Sometimes she pounces on it. Sometimes it's the evil eye. Then there are other times when she pretends indifference, but that never lasts for long. At bedtime, however, there's another reaction.

Bunny: (suddenly alert) What are you doing?!

Husband: I'm going to move you over.

Bunny: You wouldn't dare! You know how hard the wrinkles in the blanket are on my sensitive skin!

Husband: Well, you've left us no choice.

Bunny: But I'm so sleepy! (exaggerated puppy yawn)

Me: Alight, fine, I'll do it!

Bunny: (leaping up) Okay! Okay! Sheesh! You people!

At this point, Bunny does stand up, and I get under the covers as quickly as possible. No sooner do I lay down than Bunny curls up against me as close as she can get. At least she's forgiving!