Friday, December 31, 2010

Things That Go Crash In The Night

Sometimes being right isn't as great as you'd like it to be.  I know, it sounds surprising, but I'm betting many  of you out there with spouses, significant others or who have shared your life with another person at one time can relate.  It all happened Wednesday night. 

Turn out at our house is an orchestrated event.  We have a turn out pen and the Greyhounds have always been used to taking care of business in there.  However, when Morgan came home, Mr. Taleteller was reluctant to train her to use the pen.  Okay, the truth is, he couldn't bear to just put her in there and make her deal with having to go in there, so his girl gets walked out in the yard to do her business.  It's a bit safer anyway, because I fear that she has a good chance of knocking Lilac down in there in her, ahem, youthful exhuberance.  I have put her in the pen on occasion, but she seems clueless about getting down to business in there and prefers to spend the time barking at Sammy, the neighbor dog, or anybody who might be walking down the street. 

So, turn out involves taking the hounds out to the pen.  During that time, Morgan is in her crate, howling like a banshee because they are going out somewhere without her.  Then, Morgan goes out on a leash in the yard by the pen and takes care of her business.  She's brought back inside and  then the Greyhounds are fetched out of the pen and brought back in the house.  

It all sounds very simple, doesn't it?  Of course, there's a complication.  You knew there was going to be one.  Morgan is not happy anytime any of us leaves the house without her.  She runs to the kitchen windows in the corner and leaps up to see what's going on outside.  I told Mr. Taleteller that she's going to break that window one day.  He poo pooed me, acting like I had bats in the belfry and that his girl does not have any sort of deficiency in her perfect behavior.  No matter how sweetly I have mentioned that I thought this was an issue, I was ignored.  If I'm in the living room or kitchen, I can curb her behavior.  I tell her "off" or rattled the dreaded shake can, or if she just can't control herself at all, I send her to her crate.  Once the cycle of barking is stopped or the departing party has returned, all is okay in her world and we return to normal. 

Well, darned if I wasn't right.  Wednesday night we arrived home and I was in the bathroom taking out my contacts when I heard a loud crash just after my husband had brought her back inside.  I rushed out to find out what she or Mr. Taleteller had broken.  It could have been either of them at that point.  I yelled out and got no reply from hubby.  The next thing I knew, he was a blur.  Honestly, I don't think I've ever seen him move so fast.  Come to think of it, when I passed out after the bike ride debacle a couple of years ago, I am reasonably sure that he didn't even move so fast then.  He flew into the house to see if Morgan was okay.  That's when I saw it, from the kitchen doorway -- the glass hanging askew and partly missing from the kitchen window. 

Morgan was checked briefly and then put in the crate.  Mr. Taleteller started picking up glass, but then realized the girls were still outside and went to bring them in.  We blockaded that corner and set their food out to keep them out of the way.  We set to work cleaning up the glass carefully and then got Morgan back out of her crate and gave her a very thorough check.  She didn't have any injuries, cuts or glass in her fur.  Mr. Taleteller and I both managed to get the glass cleaned up without injury as well.

So, I guess the moral of the story is that the cost of being right is a twenty dollar piece of glass and a small fragment of your spouse's pride.  Seeing your husband happy with his dream girl is priceless, though.  All's well that ends well.  Funny that Mr. Taleteller took her wherever he went on Thursday -- probably out of fear that I'd throttle her.  It was tempting, but not worth seeing the end of a boy and his dog so happy together.  I believe window avoidance training has already commenced.

Maybe my New Year's resolution should be not to gloat...  Nah!

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Thursday, December 30, 2010

Christmas Party Girl

Bunny here at the keyboard sharing a few things I haven't had time to so far.

We might have mentioned that December is a pretty busy month for us.  I got to go to not one, but two parties this month and I wanted to share a little bit about that.  Sometimes it pays to be a cute and popular little hound.

One of them was at the nursing home we visit.  It was our last visit for the month and they had requested that we visit the assisted living facility part last since they were having a Christmas concert, so we went over to the Alzheimer's wing first and worked our way back.  I dressed up in my fancy collar, coat and had my toenails painted Fire Hydrant Red.  I have to say that I did look very festive.  Anyroo, I headed over to the assisted living building with my friends and they were having a reception after the concert. 

We were staying in the front room, so as not to bother all the party goers who might not want to see us.  It's hard to imagine that anyone wouldn't want to see us, but I saw the Grinch Who Stole Christmas, so anything is possible.  Well, the director lady came out and invited us to go into the reception.  She said the people would love us, but we still didn't want to start a riot or anything, since we tend to be like rock stars there, and we quietly socialized with the people in the front.  The next thing we knew, the lady was bringing the punch bowl out to the front room and all these people were following.  That punch bowl had the most delicious-looking pink punch I have ever laid eyes on.  I admit it, I was mesmerized by it.  The woman came over and handed Mom a glass of the punch.  Some of the people were noticing that I was interested in that punch, so when Mom got almost done with hers, she let me have some.  That really got the party started.  The next thing I knew, everyone was taking pictures of me drinking out of the glass and fussing over me.  The woman even asked Mom if I wanted a refill.  I said yes, but Mom declined and said we had more visiting to do. 

After we got all done visiting, we got presents from the ladies who organize our visiting group, which is called Paw to Paw.  We got some different treats and a toy each, and Blueberry and I got a notepad with our names on it and Morgan got one with her name on it, and they even have pictures of a Greyhound and German Shepherd on them.  We are really excited and impressed by these.  Now people will really know that the notes came from us.

My second party was at Mom's last day of school.  My number one fan sent me a message on Facebook and asked if I was going to be visiting at school any before Christmas.  When I found out that the last day before break was her last day of school there ever, I begged Mom to let me go.  She said I could come on the last day, which was a fun day.  I told Miss Mikayla that I'd be there and even wore my pink Winter collar for her because pink is what she asked me to wear.  I took her one of my special Christmas cards and gave her my last trading card, too.  She brought me some pink treats that look like little cupcakes, too.  I will really miss seeing her at school, but I hope she does great at her new school!

I also helped the kids in Mom's class deliver Christmas presents to people in the building who help them, like the librarian and the lunch ladies.  We made newspaper snowballs for a snowball fight and I went to music class with them.  That part was great!  They sang with jingle bells and I loved that part.  The songs sounded really festive.

All these parties have been so much fun.  I think I was born to be a socialite.  I've tried to convince Mom and Dad that we need to attend more parties, or have one at our house, but they say they are partied out.  I'll come up with a plan after I take a nap and catch up on my sleep after all the excitement of the holidays!

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Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Christmas Finally Got Here

Bunny here at the keyboard, finally, getting to share a little about our Christmas.

Mom and Dad were really busy this month, and Christmas Eve there were gone for about forever and Dad came home with gloves that smelled absolutely fascinating.  We were hoping that meant we were getting something really interesting on Christmas morning, but nothing that smelled like those gloves appeared.  We did notice Christmas morning that our stockings were looking different than they had the night before.

It turns out that we were good hounds this year -- even Lilac.  That was a huge relief!  We all had good stuff in our stockings.  I even got a tiny hedgeamahog, because Morgan ate my Christmas one from last year.  We got to spend some time with Mom and Dad in the morning and they didn't even get home too late that night.

I think Christmas ought to come around more often than once a year.  Everybody seems to feel generous and happy.  Plus, lots of things go on sale!  I think we could all use a little more Christmas throughout the year. 

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Monday, December 27, 2010

Yes Bunny, There Is A Santa Claus

Our Christmas was a pleasant one, albeit rather busy.  One of the things that's always important to us is having time to spend with the girls.  We try to work things in during the month of December that includes them as much as we can.  You may recall from earlier blog posts that one of the things we did was taking the girls to see Santa at the local dog bakery.

The profits from the portraits were being donated to a local animal society, so we were happy to pay ten dollars for a picture that we'd be able to keep for a long time.  You might recall that Santa left us feeling a his demeanor.  They had a high tech professional camera that took dozens of pictures in a matter of seconds.  After they were done, we knew the first batch of pictures was no good.  We repositioned the dogs, got Bunny and Morgan to sit with Blue standing behind them and everyone looking at the camera.  I was really excited after that batch of pictures.  They told us they'd choose the best one and print it.

A couple of weeks later, I was in the dog bakery picking up a few things and they were distributing the photos to customers.  I was glad I was in there since we'd thought they were being mailed to us after we had to fill out our mailing info.  The girl put the picture in a separate bag and I took it out to the car to look at it.

That was the best picture of the bunch?  Good heaven!  Morgan's tongue is over her nose, Blueberry isn't even looking at the camera and Bunny is standing.  Santa's eyes are closed and he looks like he's been out on a bender!  I know that picture was from the first bad batch.

I guess I can't complain much.  Hopefully most of the money went to charity.  I'd hate to see the rest of the pictures if that was the best one, though.  At least the snowman was smiling!  Hopefully it at least gives you all a smile on a Monday morning.

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Sunday, December 26, 2010

Why We Should Have Stayed Home With The Dogs On Christmas Eve

I regret to inform you that for the most part, the dogs are not going to have a lot to do with this story, but I felt like sharing it anyway, so here it goes.  I love the season of Christmas, but I also find it completely exhausting.  My parents have been divorced since I was seven years old, so having two of every holiday became commonplace for me as I grew up.  When you're a kid, having two Christmases and birthdays is a pretty good deal. 

Now that I'm an adult and married, the holidays are a lot more complicated.  Since Mr. Taleteller and I got married, both of my parents have gotten married.  This means that I now have four family Christmases on my side, plus one at Mr. Taleteller's house.  Christmas Eve has always been when we celebrated with my dad's family, a throwback to our Norwegian heritage that still continues.  It's one that is fun for us, and more laid back.  It involves my dad, stepmom, sister, Mr. Taleteller and me. 

This year the plan was that we'd meet at my dad's house and then go over to the city and see True Grit.  We met early, knowing that with the possibility of a lot more snow falling that day that it could possibly take us up to an  hour to reach the theatre.  As it turned out, it didn't start snowing too hard until we'd gotten almost to the theatre.  We arrived and found out that the movie time had been changed and we were an hour early.  I might mention at this point that my sister had gone to work out early that morning and had taken something to help her get motivated for working out that is the equivalent of six cans of soda.  She was like The Hulk, just waiting to go postal on someone.  We purchased our tickets and then went next door to pick up a gift certificate for a last minute attender to Mr. Taleteller's family get together that we needed.  That took all of ten minutes.  Then, my dad got a bright idea.

My stepgrandmother lives about five minutes from the movie theatre.  It turns out that a deer had been struck by a car near her house and had died in her yard.  She had planned to call someone to move the deer when she, my dad and stepmom all returned from the trip they're taking to visit my stepbrothers and their families in California.  However, she's one of those worrier types.  My dad had visions of her driving my stepmom insane with her worrying the entire trip about getting the dead deer out of her yard.  Apparently the road commision will move it if it's by the road, but not if it's too far away.  My dad figured it was just across the ditch and just needed to be moved by the road to be picked up.  He surveyed the passengers of the car and surmised that it would be an easy task to drag this dead deer to the road.  Nobody was consulted in this plan of his, he just told my stepmom to make a call and see if it had been moved yet.  It had not.

Suddenly, I was glad I'd dressed up a bit for Christmas Eve.  My red wool coat and white gloves were not suited to moving deer carcasses, and there is no way my dad would ever ask my stepmom to do such a task.  That left Mr. Taleteller, my dad and my sister still amped up on workout juice to move the deer.  We arrived at Stepgranny's house and saw no deer.  This did not bode well in my mind.  Dad parked the vehicle and we all got out and walked around the house. 

A giant deer with a badly fractured leg lay fifty yards or so from the road, across from a rather steep ditch.  It had been dead a couple of days and coyotes had started working on the head.  Apparently Rudolph's nose is highly coveted by coyotes.  It was a gruesome sight for sure.  The three of them began dragging it towards the road and I just had to walk away.  Mr. Taleteller launched into a spontaneous rendition of "Grandma Ran Over Santa's Reindeer."  My sister was definitely the smallest member of the group, but darned if she wasn't in the lead for dragging that dead deer.  Finally, those energy powders were good for something.  I don't think the ditch even phased her, although I thought my husband was about to take a header at that point.

Ten minutes from when they started, the task was done.  We all loaded back into the car and headed back to the movie theatre to watch True Grit.  The movie finished and we stopped at a local restaurant for dinner where it appeared that they'd forgotten to turn on the heat.  We sat bundled up in our coats eating our salads and pasta.  I felt like we might be in some sort of reality sitcom yet again.  It was definitely a Christmas Eve to remember! 

Sometimes I think it really might be better if we were orphans who got to spend Christmas at home alone with our dogs.  Fortunately, when we got home, they were still as glad to see us as always.  Morgan has a newfound interest in Mr. Taleteller's gloves, which I fear we'll have to hide from her for all time.  The dogs were nice enough to share the couch with us and watch Christmas Vacation with us while we wrapped presents for Christmas morning. 

So how did you spend Christmas Eve?  I'm betting nobody else gets to say they spent it hauling a dead deer.  I feel so special!

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Saturday, December 25, 2010

Good Tidings To All

We'd just like to take a moment to wish everyone who reads our blog a Merry Christmas, God Jul, Feliz Navidad, Happy Channukah or good tidings for whatever you choose to celebrate at this time of year.  Hopefully, you'll get something you wished for today and be able to enjoy time with family and friends.  No matter what I find wrapped up under the Christmas tree today, I have already been blessed with the best presents of all.  Those would be the wonderful Mr. Taleteller, who understands my insanity and is probably the only person in the world who could live with me, and four furry bodies who also humor me in my craziness every day.  The best part is that they keep giving every day of the year!

Wherever you are and whoever you're with, know that if you share our everyday lives with us that we are thankful for you and that we wish you the best, not just today, but every day.    Enjoy the spirit of the season and peace be with you.

We're participating in this Saturday's Pet Blog Hop, hosting by Life With Dogs, Two Little Cavaliers and Confessions of the Plume.  If you'd like to participate, please follow the rules and follow your three hosts, add your blog to the Linky and copy and paste the html code into your html editor.  Thanks again to our hosts for putting on the hop!

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Friday, December 24, 2010

It Happened One Christmas Eve...

Bunny here with a little tale about our Christmas Eve adventures.

You see, it just so happened that we were waiting up for Santa, since I was sure he'd want to take me up on that offer to take over the job from the reindeer.  That's when I got a call.  It was Alien calling to tell us that he had a problem.  His mechanical reindeer weren't working and he needed to fly around the world to deliver presents and keep Sallie from being disappointed again.  Well, I told him that Blueberry and I could pull that space age sleigh faster than any reindeer and since Santa hadn't seen the wisdom of my plan, we'd be happy to help him out.

Blueberry and I donned our Christmas coats and dashed to the door, only to find Lilac and Morgan both there, too.  We tried to convince Lilac that she did not want to come along and pull Alien's sleigh, but she was not to be deterred.  Morgan also kept insisting that she could keep up.  Before we could sort it out, the Hicbarian technology had engaged and we were up in the sleigh with Alien.  Morgan begged to help us, so I took the lead and Morgan ran beside Blueberry. 

It was going pretty smoothly as we ran along, stopping at all the homes of the dogs we knew had been good and leaving them all sorts of good treats.  We even stopped at all the shelters and left presents and food for the dogs and cats waiting for their forever homes.  It was rather exhilarating to run along in the sky combining our Greyhound speed and the Hicbarian technology so that we could fly.

Well, it just so happened that Lilac might have been whispering something in Alien's ear that had him distracted.  While he was gazing into her eyes, we saw Santa zipping through the sky with his eight reindeer.  We couldn't help it.  Our Greyhound instincts kicked in and we took off.  We just had to pass Santa and those reindeer.  As we raced off in hot pursuit, Alien and Lilac had to hang on back there in the sleigh.

I heard Santa shout "Ho Ho Ho" and I yelled "Eat My Dust" and we gave it everything we had.  It was awesome!  Santa and all his reindeer stared at us as we flew past them with mouths in a perfect O shape.  If I'd had time, I'd have snapped a picture, but we were going too fast.  I'm hoping we don't end up on the naughty list next year over a little friendly competition, but if we do, that's okay.  It was completely worth it!

Soon, we were all done with our important job and we headed back so Alien could deliver his special present for Sallie.  Then we headed home because we were definitely in need of a nap.  We Greyhounds run hard and sleep hard, it's just part of who we are.  No sooner were we back home then Morgan, Blueberry and I were all curled up in our beds and dreaming of sugar bones. 

Imagine our surprise when we woke up Christmas morning and found a stash of presents under the tree.   Everything we'd asked for was wrapped up nicely under the tree.  There was even a new fan with a big red bow on top.  I walked up to the tree in awe.  There on top of my presents was a letter from Santa.

Dear Bunny,

You were right!  Greyhounds are much faster than reindeer.  I was amazed by your speed as you charged past my coursers.  For a little hound, you are certainly fast!  Next year, will you please guide my sleigh with a team of Greyhounds?  

Please accept these gifts as a reward for your generosity in helping  Alien deliver presents to those I couldn't reach.  I'll be looking forward to meeting you next year!


P.S.  Lilac's present involved handcuffs, Alien and that sleigh of his.  I'm sure she'll be back in due time!

Wow!  I guess dreams do come true, for all of us!  Merry Christmas to all!

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Letters to Santa -- Bunny

I know that Bunny is a little hound with big dreams, but I really had no idea how big her dreams had gotten.  Here's her letter, the last of the ones for Santa.  I wonder if he'll send a reply.
Dear Santa,

Bunny here, writing you a letter with a few thoughts I've had.

I know most hounds and humans write you letters with things that they want, and I do have a list that I'll get to in a little bit.  First, though, I have an idea that I think merits your attention.  I hope you'll consider my suggestions.

You see, I've noticed that you fly around the world being pulled by eight reindeer.  There is no way that a reindeer is as fast as a Greyhound.  If you had Greyhounds to pull your sleigh, you'd get done a lot faster, and then we could all go back to the North Pole and take a long winter's nap.  We could wear festive coats with lights flashing on them and even boots so that no one would hear us when we land on the roofs of the houses we visit.  Nobody would be woken up by the pawing and prancing of each little hoof, because we'd all curl up quietly and rest while you were down in the houses distributing the toys.  We also eat a lot less than reindeer, so we'd be more cost efficient.  I think you'd also have to agree that we're a lot sweeter and nicer than reindeer, too.  I mean, which one would you rather curl up with by the fire after all the Christmas work is over?  I think you have to agree that we're much more suited to the job.  Blueberry and I are willing to do the job, and I'm sure that we can find six more friends who are willing to help out!  Just let us know if you're interested.

As for my list, I mostly hope that each of my sisters and Mom and Dad get what they want.  They've been good all year -- well, except for Lilac, but she's old and she needs some breaks.  Don't hold those things she does against her, please.  I'd like a couple of new Tummy Warmers, some dog bakery treats, some pink sparkly things, and a winning lottery ticket.  That way I could hire Mom as my personal assistant and she could stay home with me all day.  I think that would be the best present ever!


P.S.  Don't worry about Morgan biting you when you get here.  We talked and I've got it all worked out.  As long as she gets to sniff you first, it's all good!

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Thursday, December 23, 2010

Letters to Santa -- Lilac

I'm guessing that most of you know by now that I found some letters the girls wrote to Santa.  I decided to post them this week since we've been extremely busy with five family Christmas parties, shopping, several birthdays and work.  I wonder if Santa is amused.
Dear Santa,

I'm not going to lie to you. I've been bad this year.  When you get as old as I am, you learn to take liberties.  I poop on the floor if I feel like it, bark to wake the humans up in the middle of the night if I feel restless so they can join me, steal food if I can and teach Morgan as many of my habits as I can.  Let's face it, somebody has to keep the tradition alive when I'm gone, and it won't be those goody two shoes Bunny and Blueberry!

A note to Santa from Bunny -- Please remember that Lilac is very old!  She's a little senile, I'm afraid.  Please don't let her attitude reflect on the rest of us here, I beg you!  Blueberry, Morgan and I are good girls!

Anyhow, Santa, I think I ought to get credit just for being alive at this point, and for letting Mom and Dad get a few hours sleep every night.  I'd really like a new coat that covers my behind and for you to explain to Mom and Dad that I need a Potty Patch.  It's too darned cold for me to be going outside to take care of business!  I'd also like an assortment of treats, an elevator for the back steps and a new Mother Bunny bunny or tribble, and a dias with some handsome young men to carry me around.  Please deliver these when you bring the other presents on Christmas Eve!


Dear Santa,

Please don't let the rest of us die of embarrassment!  I don't know where she gets her crazy ideas.  I swear that we're good girls!


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