Sunday, December 26, 2010

Why We Should Have Stayed Home With The Dogs On Christmas Eve

I regret to inform you that for the most part, the dogs are not going to have a lot to do with this story, but I felt like sharing it anyway, so here it goes.  I love the season of Christmas, but I also find it completely exhausting.  My parents have been divorced since I was seven years old, so having two of every holiday became commonplace for me as I grew up.  When you're a kid, having two Christmases and birthdays is a pretty good deal. 

Now that I'm an adult and married, the holidays are a lot more complicated.  Since Mr. Taleteller and I got married, both of my parents have gotten married.  This means that I now have four family Christmases on my side, plus one at Mr. Taleteller's house.  Christmas Eve has always been when we celebrated with my dad's family, a throwback to our Norwegian heritage that still continues.  It's one that is fun for us, and more laid back.  It involves my dad, stepmom, sister, Mr. Taleteller and me. 

This year the plan was that we'd meet at my dad's house and then go over to the city and see True Grit.  We met early, knowing that with the possibility of a lot more snow falling that day that it could possibly take us up to an  hour to reach the theatre.  As it turned out, it didn't start snowing too hard until we'd gotten almost to the theatre.  We arrived and found out that the movie time had been changed and we were an hour early.  I might mention at this point that my sister had gone to work out early that morning and had taken something to help her get motivated for working out that is the equivalent of six cans of soda.  She was like The Hulk, just waiting to go postal on someone.  We purchased our tickets and then went next door to pick up a gift certificate for a last minute attender to Mr. Taleteller's family get together that we needed.  That took all of ten minutes.  Then, my dad got a bright idea.

My stepgrandmother lives about five minutes from the movie theatre.  It turns out that a deer had been struck by a car near her house and had died in her yard.  She had planned to call someone to move the deer when she, my dad and stepmom all returned from the trip they're taking to visit my stepbrothers and their families in California.  However, she's one of those worrier types.  My dad had visions of her driving my stepmom insane with her worrying the entire trip about getting the dead deer out of her yard.  Apparently the road commision will move it if it's by the road, but not if it's too far away.  My dad figured it was just across the ditch and just needed to be moved by the road to be picked up.  He surveyed the passengers of the car and surmised that it would be an easy task to drag this dead deer to the road.  Nobody was consulted in this plan of his, he just told my stepmom to make a call and see if it had been moved yet.  It had not.

Suddenly, I was glad I'd dressed up a bit for Christmas Eve.  My red wool coat and white gloves were not suited to moving deer carcasses, and there is no way my dad would ever ask my stepmom to do such a task.  That left Mr. Taleteller, my dad and my sister still amped up on workout juice to move the deer.  We arrived at Stepgranny's house and saw no deer.  This did not bode well in my mind.  Dad parked the vehicle and we all got out and walked around the house. 

A giant deer with a badly fractured leg lay fifty yards or so from the road, across from a rather steep ditch.  It had been dead a couple of days and coyotes had started working on the head.  Apparently Rudolph's nose is highly coveted by coyotes.  It was a gruesome sight for sure.  The three of them began dragging it towards the road and I just had to walk away.  Mr. Taleteller launched into a spontaneous rendition of "Grandma Ran Over Santa's Reindeer."  My sister was definitely the smallest member of the group, but darned if she wasn't in the lead for dragging that dead deer.  Finally, those energy powders were good for something.  I don't think the ditch even phased her, although I thought my husband was about to take a header at that point.

Ten minutes from when they started, the task was done.  We all loaded back into the car and headed back to the movie theatre to watch True Grit.  The movie finished and we stopped at a local restaurant for dinner where it appeared that they'd forgotten to turn on the heat.  We sat bundled up in our coats eating our salads and pasta.  I felt like we might be in some sort of reality sitcom yet again.  It was definitely a Christmas Eve to remember! 

Sometimes I think it really might be better if we were orphans who got to spend Christmas at home alone with our dogs.  Fortunately, when we got home, they were still as glad to see us as always.  Morgan has a newfound interest in Mr. Taleteller's gloves, which I fear we'll have to hide from her for all time.  The dogs were nice enough to share the couch with us and watch Christmas Vacation with us while we wrapped presents for Christmas morning. 

So how did you spend Christmas Eve?  I'm betting nobody else gets to say they spent it hauling a dead deer.  I feel so special!

Blueberry Types for the Blog
Bookmark and Share


  1. What?

    No pictures?

    If it is any consolation, I think you win for most creative way to spend a christmas eve!


    Khyra's Mom

  2. Wow! That one'll go down in the "remember when" book!! Yep, it's definitely nicer to stay home with the dogs (cover the human relatives ears)...Merry Christmas!!

  3. Oh you poor dear! So sorry about the dead animal, but WHAT A STORY! Sounds like you need a bit of quiet time with the houndies...

  4. Mr. Taleteller singing Grandma cracked me up! We do think you win the prize for most creative way to spend Christmas Eve.

    P.S. - How was True Grit? I worry about messing with a classic movie.

  5. Glad you were dressed up and wearing a warm coat! How will you ever top that Christmas Eve?

  6. Wow! It's funny that you said you watched Christmas Vacation after all this. As I read your story, I thought you had your very own version of the movie. I can relate to the multiple holiday syndrome. I'm sure everything improved when you got home to the hounds. :)

  7. All those fambly obligashuns make my head spin! So glad mom dussn't has any of that and takes me hiking instead. So I has a burning kwestshun: Did the udders smell like eau de dead deer afterwards at dinner? It do be my favorite perfoom.

  8. That is quite a vision. I'm with Khyra - where are the photos? :)

    I'm glad that you made it home safe and sound. Your rest is coming soon, perhaps even today!

  9. Pip's mom here. I understand the divorced parent holiday problem. I am not a big fan of the holidays for the same reason, too much stress. My parents divorced when I was two and have always lived on opposite ends of the country. My husband's parents live far away, too. So, we always have to decide who we are going to spend the holidays with and someone always feels left out, gets mad, etc. Having a child only makes things worse. I guess it is a little better now then when I was a kid (I was one of the few kids, I guess, who dread the holidays), but it is still difficult so I understand your feelings.

    The good news - IT IS OVER!


  10. Ah family... everybody has one.
    We gave up on coordinating Christmas day years ago due to the complexities of a blended family and both kids being married with in law families of their own. Now we just figure if we all see each other at some point between Christmas and New Years we're doing great. Of course we haven't had a deer carcass to make the day more memorable. Glad your sister's gym work paid out and that you were able to maintain your festive holiday outfit. Gosh, I would bet if Bambi had stayed where he was he would have been gone in a few days anyway. Oh well.

    Mango Momma

  11. Ooooh, you are a very lucky girl, indeed!

  12. as someone else said you DO get the award of a most unusual and one-of-a-kind Christmas Eve!!

  13. Oh my Deer! Gross and yet a very (lack of better word) thoughtful thing to do. You did a righteous job in the telling of a great story we're sure you'll never forget and fur shore, WE'LL not forget soon either hee hee! Thanks for the unique telling about your fun xmas eve with your interesting family!
    Sammie and Avalon

  14. Okay, if we are giving out prizes for the craziest win, Paws Down!! LOL!

    Years from now, you will look back and have a good might take some counseling first..hehe

  15. Well now... I'm thinkin some Hollywood type may just see this and decided to make a movie!!!
    All kidding aside.. the holidays can be very tough on Two Leggers. I'm thinkin they should take some lessons from US.

  16. You certainly had a Christmas eve to remember! I love it!! Christmas without love and laughter is just not the same. Merry Christmas to you and yours.

  17. That sounds like something right out of the movies. Mom spent the evening wrapping and then re-wrapping what Cleo was un-wrapping. :) The HoundDogs

  18. AND there are no photos of this memorable event? BOL. The Momster says she almost would have traded with you for a house full of grandkids all in hyper mode waiting for the arrival of Santa - SIX of them!!! But then she says she loves them too much to pass the fun and noise up for a deer:)

    It definitely will be a night you won't forget for long. Dad wants to know how the movie was?

    Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas Day despite the Eve's adventure.

    Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

  19. Wow! That is some Christmas eve!! How was true grit?

  20. Oh my word!! Best to stay home with the kids
    Benny & Lily

  21. Crikey - that was a bit of a different way to spend Christmas Eve. But think of it like this - it'll certainly be a talking point for many years and like you say, we bet no-one else did that on Christmas Eve so you ARE special in a way!

    We hope you're having a good Christmas without too many other surprises, he he he!

    We're glad you got the picture in time for Christmas and we hope you enjoy it!

    Schnauzer snuggles - JD and Max.

  22. I can just see it in my mind so clearly! For once I`m glad to say there were no deer in my Christmas eve happenings be they white-tail or rein!

  23. OY VAY!!! I think the cute red coat and white gloves were like a magic protection! I'll remember that. Maybe if I wear that to my in-law's next Christmas Eve...Hmmmm. Glad the movie was good :-)

  24. Okay. We are officially The Most Boring People in Blogland. We stayed home with the dogs, watched 'It's a Wonderful Life' and went to bed early. I confess, I'm really glad that our evening didn't involve a dead deer...

    -Dr. Liz (the dogs are napping after some serious snow zoomies)

  25. we took the doggies with us and we did have a great time; though Not as eventful as yours.....

    now, you Need your rest!
    coco and tiffy

  26. Yikes! My Christmas was much easier! I do not envy those of divorced families.

  27. You're right there - my spiced cider and gingerbread cookies just don't compare. Somehow, I'm ok with that. ;)

    Here's hoping for a much less gruesome New Year's eve!

  28. Oh my goodness that was some Christmas eve. Hope next year will be more restful

  29. They say write what you know~ and some of the best comedy scripts come from true stories like this~

    Oh my family is the same~

    My in-laws (out-laws)
    Mom and Dad (their divorce is final this wed.. they would have been married 38 years if they made it to march 11)

    and don't get me started on my siblings for space!!

    I love stories like this..
    Your spending it with family~
    but it's a crazy funny chuckle..

    I always tell Rob..
    Jim Carrey would play him (I plan to write a script)
    me... not sure yet... ha ha)

    Elgin Momma

  30. Well, I worked both the eve and the night of Christmas; three crazy shifts that still don't compare to moving a deer carcass, blech! We're celebrating a late holiday with our parents and grandparents over the next two days, which is GREYT because we can bring the girls :)

    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

  31. For years, I thought I had the worst Christmas story ever--the one where the car broke down on a freezing Christmas day 3 hours from home. While my husband got a tow truck, my mother-in-law and I hung out in a rest stop. Oh, and my dog Agatha was with us so we couldn't go anywhere but the back foyer (at least they allowed us to get out of the single digit temperatures that much!).

    But I think you just did it. I would much rather be shivering in a hallway with my dog than moving a dead deer with my family (and no dogs).

    So it wasn't a great occasion but you certainly got a good story out of it!

  32. Hmm...a dead deer? How did you get a hold of my Christmas list??? ;)

    I HATE when mom wears gloves too...she's not supposed to have fuzzy hands, so I try to remove them.

  33. OMG, that is a hilarious story. Grandma got run over by a reindeer! I don't know if i should laugh or feel sorry that is how you spent your holiday!

    in CA, we live in the boonies. deer or coyotes will turn up dead on our walking trail. we push them over the mountain side and keep on keepin' on. but draging them to the road in your best xmas clothes and then head off to a movie and a salad like it's nothing? priceless!

    at least we got to see Blue's face in this post!

  34. I bet the hounds would have liked to help! :)

  35. BOL! We're just reading back over the posties we missed and mom said we HAD to comment on this one. She SO understands the multiple Christmases thing cuz her pawrents are divorced, too. And she said that she agrees that 2 Christmases were fun as a kid but sure seem like a lotta work since she's all grown up. I think she's KER-AZY! More Christmases = more pressies!

    Anyway, no...there was no dead deer hauling on our Christmas Eve but, well, I kinda wish there had been.

    Wiggles & Wags,


We love hearing your comments!

Related Posts with Thumbnails